


Dirty Little Secret

by Trixy4Olly



Category: X-Men (Movies)
Genre: Everyone lives, No Character Death, Other, Possible One Shot, Self-Harm, Wolverine whump, X-men - Freeform, i can't think of any more tags, poor Logan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-23
Updated: 2016-02-24
Packaged: 2018-05-08 14:45:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5501336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trixy4Olly/pseuds/Trixy4Olly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They wouldn't understand. They don't know the truth. The Wolverine has a dirty little secret that he has kept for a long, long time. A short story about why Logan is the way he is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

One line, two lines, three lines, four. Five lines, six lines, seven lines, more. He needed more. The lines healed almost instantly, so he knew he could take the shard of glass in his hand and jab it through his arm and it would heal so fast he couldn't feel the pain fast enough. The man gripped the shard harshly, causing more cuts on his fingers to appear, then heal. The only evidence that any would was even there to begin with was the blood that had been pushed out of the wound when his cuts healed. They healed and healed and he didn't want them to. He wanted them to stay to scab and scar, he wanted to feel the pain, pain that stayed for longer than a second he wanted to fall asleep at night with his arm sore. He wanted to have to take pills just to get the pain away. He wanted to have a nurse or doctor look at his wounds and have him stay overnight. He never went to the doctors, not even before his powers came, when he was just a child. His mother ignored him and any injuries he sustained for his fathers beatings. They were both drunkin addicts. They bought booze with the money they had from there low paying jobs and often neglected him. Too many times to count had he gone hungry when thay sent him to his room after watching them brawl over who was paying the bills this month. Too many times had he missed school for the pain of his injuries was so bad. They never took him to the doctors, often saying one of two things either it cost to much or it was his fault. His mother never kissed his bruises when he fell of his bike, she sent him to his room for dareing to complain about a small scratch. His father told him how he had the easy life, how he could take care of his own things, buy his own food, and do chores even though he was only 10 he had to do the dishes, take out the trash, make dinner for them then go to his room hungry, and have to clean up the blood he had spilt when his father beat him. He knew that parents were supposed to love there child, how they let them sleep with them when the kid had a nightmare or when the mother made her son try on a hundred different outfits for school, or their father told them how mom was wrong and say mustang was the better car. But that didn't happen in his family, it never happened. The only advice they have him was treat people how they expect to be treated. If they think your stupid, pretend your stupid. If they think your a bully, act like a bully. It can take you years to have someone finally realize they were wrong and your the reason their not flunking school. So make it easy and pretend. It's their fault they judged you within the first 10 minutes of meeting you, after all you aren't supposed to judge a book by its cover, are you? As Logan took the chunk of glass and raised it to cut his bloody wrist again, something stopped him. He wouldn't die if he took a bullet to the brain, so why was he slitting his skin open over his dead parents? Maby it was because the others had something to do with it. They hadn't been yelling at him, he was doing great as of lately actually. He stopped drinking as much on his free time, his smoking stopped almost completely unless he was really tense. Why he quit was another question though, it wouldn't affect his Heath so what was it? He thought for almost ten minutes, just sitting there staring at the wall, glass raised over his scarless arm. He thought and thought, maby it was becouse the others were uncomfortable sometimes. Jean was uncomfortable with his smoking and Scott was uncomfortable with his drinking and smoking. Actually when he smoked others had the tendency to leave the room, most likely not wanting to be the victim of second hand smoke. But in his moment of sadness he took it as the others not liking him. After all who would like a cocky, rude, man who pretended to be above others. He wasn't really like that but the last time he let someone in, the last time he shared a weakness with someone, they had told him he should suck it up, how he was weak and pathetic, he remembers how his old friend had went to the enemy and told him everything. His friend had been a spy. The first person he decides to trust has been trying to kill him the entire time. Like he said its best to pretend and have others think less of you. If his enemy's thought that he was he less of a target and thought him to be weak, he could get them when they were unexpecting and help the others if needed. This man has hated himself for as long as he can remeber. He has always wished to be someone else, andone else, but at the same time would not want to be anyone else, someone else. He would not wish this life of decite, lies and betrayal on anyone, even though he knew he would be so much happier, with friends, with family, with lovers and people who care about you. No, he would not wish this life upon anyone. Only someone as weak as stupid and as ignorant as the Wolveine should live a life of decite, well that was what he told himself when he knew Proffesor.Xaiver was busy, after all he couldn't let him know about his dirty little secret, could he.


	2. New Enemy

Logan continued his habit in privet, only daring to hurt himself when Professor. X wasn't in the building and when he knew the rest of the X-Men were busy or asleep. He figured that if anyone wasn't getting hurt other than himself  then it was fine. He knew that if they found out they would do one of three things, tell him to stop, kick him out of the X-Men, or put him off duty until he stopped hurting himself because he might endanger someone.

When they went off against a new mutant that could manipulate you with your thoughts and turn you against yourself or your friends Logan did not expect anything exiting to happen. He was wrong.

The mutant peaked into Storms mind and found she was afraid of small spaces. The mutant who called himself 'The DoomSender' started to talk about her fear of small, dark spaces in front of the rest of the X-Men while they were fighting.

The X-Men knew about Storms fear but it wasn't spoken about very often. Or at all. They knew the basics but when 'DoomSender' started talking about why she was scared of small areas and what happend to her parents, it caught everyone off guard. Off guard enough for him to throw a small cube on the ground near their feet, and off guard enough for no one to try to run away when it exploded in a burst of yellow light.

____________________________

 

When Logan finally woke up from his forceful sleep, his mind instantly noticed that he was in a cage. A cell actually. The second thing he noticed was that the rest of the X-Men were in cells, the Proffessor came with them on this mission too so he was here also. Jean, Cyclops, Nightcrawler, Colossus, Storm, and Professor.

With his fast healing ability the gas knocked him out for less of a time then the rest of the group, they would be out for a couple of hours. He pretended to be asleep so he could see, or hear what was going on if their captor came in and started yelling at their unconscious state. Plus he was bored. He fell asleep a couple minutes in to his self stake out.

 

When he was awake again so were Nightcrawler and the Professor. They were waking up the others, by the time everyone was awake and in their right state of mind, they noticed the braclet around their ankles, and seeing how Nightcrawler couldn't flash out of here and Storm couldn't make a simple wind, they assumed it was to make your powers as a mutant useless. Storm could lockpick but their captor was very thorough in checking their clothes considering they had none of their stuff with them.

 

When their captor finally came into the cell room they were already talking about plans to break out, most of them sounding like they would end in a failure. He started ranting about how weak they were to fall so easily if one of them was emotionally hurt. Like dominoes with one made out of paper, it would fall so easily. Then he said how he was going to break them, and unlike other villains, it was mentally instead of physically. So he looked into Storms eyes, then Scott's, then Jeans. And so on, it was like a trance Jean explained, she said to avoid his eyes at all costs because it will bring up your worst memory and he will know it. When you looked into his eyes all you could do was stare and wait until your worts memory came to light in front of your eyes. So no matter how hard you tried to look away, you always failed in avoiding them. Nightcrawler must have had some bad ones for him to start to shake and breath harshly. Then again he was in the circus and chased by mobbed of towns people for his looks. He went though all of them, even the Professor with his mind shields, everyone was yelling at that point or trying to break their chain around their wrist. 

Then he got to Logan. And he knew which memories would come up too The mutants eyes turned black, compelling him to look at the mutant. The eyes of his enemy turned a darker black than he's every seen before. Then, the memories started to show up.


End file.
